Intro

As a guy who has been on and off Tinder for the last 12 years, I know how hard online dating can be at times.

Thanks to Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge, I’ve met wonderful human beings from all over the world and I will forever cherish those moments we shared.

But I also vividly remember those days (before I figured out how to get matches consistently) when I would check my apps, stare at the screen hopelessly, and wonder if there was something defective about me. It was downright painful and confidence-shattering.

If you are reading this right now, I’m guessing you are experiencing the latter.

And that’s okay, you are not inferior or gonna die alone. If you are willing to do the following things, I guarantee you will start getting more matches on Tinder.

Maximize your looks before taking Tinder photos

The first thing you need to understand about online dating is that women select men based on who they are as a person. It doesn’t matter how professional-looking your dating profile photos are, they cannot help you get more/better matches on Tinder if YOU don’t come across as attractive in those photos.

Let me elaborate.

There are two components to being an attractive man. You have your physical attractiveness, and you have your behavioral attractiveness.

If we are strictly talking about getting more Tinder matches, you only need to focus on handling your physical attractiveness, with the caveat that getting matches on Tinder won’t mean much if you “fail” most of your dates when you meet them in person.

To connect with the right woman and keep her, you must work on your inner/behavioral attractiveness, too. We will talk more about this in a separate blog.

Anyway. Before you take any new Tinder photos, do these things first to make yourself physically attractive.

Get fit first

Duh, common sense, right? But this is the most effective thing you can do to improve your physical attractiveness.

And by that, I don’t mean you need to be shredded and muscular like a fitness influencer. That would be a huge plus but it’s not mandatory. To do well with online dating, you only need to be fit enough (not obese or bony).

So If you are currently overweight, get lean before buying new clothes and taking online dating photos. Otherwise, you are just gonna waste your time and money.

Getting lean isn’t that difficult if you truly want to. Stick to a meal plan (weight your food and track your daily caloric intake), go to the gym 3 times a week (weight training), and walk 30-60 mins a day will be all you need to do to start burning fat fast.

And if you are EXTREMELY skinny, putting on some muscle mass will make you look more masculine in photos. Just eat more and lift some weights.

I’m not saying all this to body shame or whatever, I’m currently on a diet to lose some weight, too.

But let’s be real, a person with healthy self-esteem tends to take good care of themselves physically, which is attractive. And you can’t fault people for having preferences, either. After all, online dating is heavily based on looks. There’s no need to make things harder for yourself.

All in all, before you attempt online dating, it’s essential to get in shape first.

Get a good haircut before taking your Tinder photos

You can significantly improve your looks with a haircut that suits you, and looking better = more matches on Tinder. So book an appointment at a well-reviewed barber shop a few days before you take your new Tinder photos.

If you don’t know what hairstyle looks good on you, ask your barber to recommend something that compliments the shape of your face and works with your hair type.

Some barber shops also offer beard styling services if yours needs some love.

Have a basic skincare routine

I don’t use a lot of skincare products personally. My view is that your skin only looks “bad” when there is inflammation in your body, so the best skincare routine is having a clean diet, staying hydrated, and sleeping well.

But do get some skin moisturizer and facial scrub to get rid of any dry skin you may have.

Get yourself some sexy outfits

Being stylish is attractive, so prepare some nice outfits for your next Tinder photoshoot. And make sure these outfits fit your body.

“What if I have no idea how to dress well?”

All good, I can help you with that. Let’s find your personal style first.

Would you describe yourself as a classy guy, a rugged man, or an artist? How do you want to present yourself to the world?

If you are a classy guy (think finance bros, Bruce Wayne, lawyers, and doctors) then you find some TV and Movie characters that fit the description and mimic how they dress. Get your shirts, formal jackets, and pants tailored to your measurements.

Some clothing items to consider: Blazers, Oxford shirts, Wool sweaters, Chinos, Wool Trousers, Dress shoes, and Loafers

If you are a rugged man (think bikers, lumberjacks, and Jason Statham) then you find some TV and movie characters that fit this archetype and copy their looks. The theme here is tough and masculine. So consider growing out a beard to complete the look, too.

Some clothing items to consider: Field Jackets, Biker Jackets, Plaid shirts, Henley Shirts, Rugged Jeans, Combat Boots, and Chukka Boots

And if you are an artist who is bold and expressive with your styles (think Russell Brand, Johnny Depp, and Harry Styles) then pick some of your favorite celebrities and dress like them. The key is being playful and standing out.

Some clothing items to consider: Colourful Blazers, Varsity Jackets, Print Shirts, Chinos, Ripped Jeans, Trendy Sneakers, and Suede Chelsea.

By the way, you don’t have to limit yourself to just one style. You can also pick a secondary style to switch things up. Think how James Bond wears perfectly tailored Savile row suits (classy) on his job and dresses down with more rugged outfits when he is on vacation.

After you’ve completed all 4 steps I’ve listed above, congratulations, you are now ready for your next Tinder photoshoot. Let me show you how to take photos that will get you more and better matches on Tinder!

Use candid Tinder photos to show that you are a cool guy

Making a good Tinder profile can be challenging for us guys because we often don’t have enough good photos to fill out the damn profile. All good. I’ll show you how to fix that.

What most guys get wrong about Tinder photos

What most guys do when they don’t have good Tinder photos is to find a photographer to take some staged-looking portraits (headshots, photos of us standing/sitting somewhere) and hope these new photos will get them some matches.

Yup, I made that mistake, too.

Unfortunately, these portraits don’t work very well for Tinder unless you are model-looking.

Why? Because “men are from Mars women are from Venus”, lol.

Men are primarily attracted to looks. But female minds don’t operate this way. Of course, they still care about looks, but they are a lot more attracted to your status/values (your hierarchal ranking among other men) and personality (how good they FEEL around you).

You will not be able to get many matches using mainly portraits because these photos only tell girls what you look like, but they don’t display any of your status and values.

Plus, when most of your Tinder photos are staged photos, what will women automatically assume about you? In most cases, they will intuitively feel you don’t have friends to snap your photos in your everyday life, and you had to hire a photographer just so you can get some usable Tinder photos. This signals so many undesirable traits to women, so don’t do it.

“What do you do instead?”

Glad you asked. Let me show you how to get some Tinder photos that actually work. And it’s not that complicated, you just need to get some candid photos that make you look interesting, successful, and fun.

I will give you some examples.

If you do public speaking at conferences, you can take a photo of yourself giving a speech in front of a crowd. It signals that you are a leader and that’s highly attractive.

If you are a musician, you can take photos of yourself on stage (open mic works too) performing. It will be much cooler than having a photo of yourself playing guitar at home. If you are a DJ/producer, get a photo of yourself mixing tracks in a professional studio.

If you are athletic, take action photos of yourself playing hockey, competing, or surfing. A shirtless photo of you playing beach sports is a great way to show off your abs without looking like a douche. Avoid using a gym selfie like everyone else.

I know, not everyone has Instagram-able lives. Not a big deal If you don’t have opportunities to take cool photos like the ones I mentioned above, you can take some fun social and activity photos instead.

Invite a few of your friends to a nice restaurant/cocktail bar, get drunk, and take photos of yourselves laughing and having fun.

Besides that, you can also gather your friends, go do some fun activities (BBQ, Kayaking, or whatever you like), and take photos of yourself doing fun stuff and having a blast.

To sum everything up, you want to avoid staged-looking portraits and get candid shots of you doing cool/fun activities instead. You will instantly look like a cool person women wanna be around by adding these photos to your Tinder profile. Travel photos work well for the same reasons too.

Use your Tinder bio and prompts to market yourself

Disclaimer: Photos will always be the most important part of your dating profile. No matter how witty your bio and prompts are, they will not get you matches if your photos suck.

Assuming you’ve done the work and gotten some solid Tinder photos, let’s take your profile to the next level with effective bios and prompts.

Here are some tips to help you write a good bio and prompts.

Keep your bio and prompts short

No one on dating apps has the attention span to read a huge paragraph and it will only make you look desperate. Your write-ups should demonstrate things that make you look interesting, high-value, and funny in a concise and nonchalant manner. You can even use bullet points.

Create curiosity and demonstrate value via storytelling

I will use an example to demonstrate this point. One of my Hinge prompts was “Best travel story” and I wrote: “Stayed in Serbia for a month, got drunk with the locals, fell in love with a girl, and almost went to Eastern European jail for fighting off two thugs who tried to rob me. 11/10.”

The reason why I put that in my profile was this: not all, but a lot of girls would get hooked after reading this prompt. They would see this and subconsciously think: “What was he doing in an odd place like Serbia? Oh, he must be attractive to other girls. He can protect me in dangerous situations.” You can apply the same principle to writing your prompts. Make girls curious and attracted via storytelling, without sounding like you are blatantly bragging.

Talk about what kind of person you are looking for

You can include something like: “Swipe right if you are funny, bubble, and smart”. Yes, you still want to impress them, but you are also trying to find someone who fits your criteria, too. Listing the qualities you are looking for not only will make you look selective (attractive) but it will also screen out people you are not compatible with.

Avoid using too much self-deprecating humor via text

It’s a bonus if your bio and prompts are funny. But avoid using too much self-deprecating humor online. This type of humor works well in person because people can tell you are just being sarcastic from your voice and facial expressions. Not so much when used in bio and prompts.

Work with Tinder algorithms and maintain your ranking

All dating apps run on some sort of algorithm and the algorithm assigns each profile an internal “attractiveness rating”.

Tinder calls this the “ELO score”. If your “ELO score” is high your Tinder profile will be shown to more and better users and vice versa. You want to have the algorithm on your side.

So how do you do this?

First of all, launch a solid Tinder profile from the get-go

Tinder blasts your profile to other users for 24 hours after you initially sign up. If other users with high ELO scores swipe right on your profile, you will receive a high ELO score in return. This is why it’s a good idea to draft your Tinder profile in advance so you get the most out of this 24-hour window.

Next, you start swiping and get your first batch of Tinder matches

Here are a few things to keep in mind. Tinder penalizes users who swipe right on everybody. It also drops your ELO score if none of your likes are returned. Therefore, you want to be strategic with your right swipes, don’t act desperate, and don’t swipe on people who are obviously out of your league. After the first 24 hours, you should have some matches, and getting matches increases your ELO score.

Lastly, message your Tinder matches and arrange dates

Tinder drops your ELO score if you don’t talk to your matches. It also penalizes you if you say dumb shit and people stop responding to you very early into the conversation consistently. Avoid doing these things. On the contrary, Tinder will detect contact exchanges and increase your ELO score for it. This is also how you maintain a good ELO score in the long run - get quality matches, arrange dates, and be a gentleman in person so you don’t get reported.

The same rules apply to other dating apps as well.

Conclusion

Getting more matches on Tinder isn’t rocket science and anyone can do it by looking physically attractive in their dating photos and communicating value and status via photos and bio/prompts. Just make sure you don’t come across as overcompensating or bragging.

After you launch your Tinder profile and start getting matches, you need to maintain your profile ranking by consistently matching with new people and having conversations that lead to a date. Once you figure out how to do all these things, online dating will be on easy mode. From there, you’ll be able to go on a lot of dates with cute girls until you find that special someone.

Good luck my friend!